Ex won't stick to pickup schedule - what are my options?

Apr 141 min read

So my ex has been consistently late picking up the kids on my days. We agreed on 6pm Friday but she's rolling up at 7 or 7:30 like half the time. I try not to say anything because I don't want to start drama, but it's messing with my plans and honestly it's disrespectful. Do I need to document this stuff? Should I bring it up in writing through email instead of texts? Not trying to go nuclear but I need some consistency here. The custody order just says "mutually agreed upon schedule" which apparently means nothing.

6 comments114 views

Comments(6)

CCarl S.RegularApr 14

Man, that's frustrating. I'd start documenting every late pickup with times and dates, then bring it up in writing via email or text so you have a record. If it keeps happening, that's something a family law attorney can help you address.

SSteveNew DadApr 14

This would drive me nuts because it messes with the one thing you can control. Start keeping a log and maybe suggest a 15-minute grace window if you're feeling generous, but set a hard boundary after that.

NNolan J.RegularApr 14

With three kids I get how schedules get messy, but 30 minutes late is disrespectful of your time. Have you tried a direct conversation about why she's running late? Sometimes there's a real reason you can problem-solve together.

DDerekRegularApr 14

This is frustrating man. 'Late' by like 10 minutes or consistently 30+ minutes? Either way it breaks your schedule but the severity matters for how you handle it. We had this issue and honestly documentation became important.

RRyanRegularApr 14

You've got to have a conversation about what 'late' costs you. Maybe she doesn't realize it's actually affecting your plans. If she keeps doing it after you explain though, that's a different story and you might need the legal side involved.

BBrandonRegularApr 14

I feel this pain. The inconsistency messes with the kids too, makes it hard to plan anything. Have you tried a shared calendar app where she can see the impact or is that just adding extra drama?