Ex won't stick to schedule - what are my options?

2w ago1 min read

Been dealing with this for 8 months now. We have a court ordered 50/50 custody agreement but my ex keeps changing pickup times last minute or asking me to take the kids on her scheduled days. I've been flexible because I want to be the 'good guy' but now she's acting like I owe her this flexibility. Last week she asked me to keep them an extra 3 days because she had a work thing come up. When I said I couldn't she got mad and threatened to make my life difficult. Should I start documenting everything and being stricter about the schedule? I don't want to be difficult but I'm getting tired of this.

12 comments138 views

Comments(12)

RRonRegular2w ago

This is exactly why I pushed for the app route. When everything's documented in writing, it's harder for anyone to claim miscommunication happened. What kind of violations are we talking about - late pickups, skipped days, or just not following the schedule?

MMiguelRegular2w ago

That's rough. Is she consistently late or just not showing up some days? Either way, you need a lawyer to review your options. Don't try to handle this without legal backup because it affects your custody rights.

MMatt W.Regular2w ago

Document everything man. I started keeping a log of every time she changed the schedule and it actually helped when we had to go back to court. Eight months is too long to deal with that stress.

CChristopher T.New Dad2w ago

Been there with the last minute changes and it drove me crazy. Try suggesting a communication app like Our Family Wizard that keeps everything timestamped and organized. Takes the emotion out of scheduling.

EEli L.Regular2w ago

You might need to loop in a family law attorney if she's consistently violating the order. I know it sucks, but protecting your parenting time is worth it. How's it affecting the kids' routine?

VVincentRegular2w ago

I feel for you. My ex used to do something similar and it was chaos trying to plan anything. Your best move is to get everything in writing from here on out. Texts, app messages, all of it. Then if you need to go back to court, you have a paper trail.

DDerekNew Dad2w ago

This is frustrating because it affects the kids more than anything else. They need to know when they're going to be with each parent. If she's consistently breaking the agreement, you might need to talk to your custody attorney about enforcement.

VVincentRegular2w ago

This is exhausting and you have every right to be frustrated. Eight months of this is too long. Have you documented every missed pickup and late return? That's going to be crucial if you need to go back to court. A lawyer who specializes in custody can tell you if you have grounds for modification.

VVincentRegular2w ago

I feel for you man. The inconsistency is probably stressing the kids out more than you realize. Court ordered means she's legally bound. You might need to enforce it through the courts if she won't respect the agreement on her own.

MMiguelRegular2w ago

Eight months of that would drive me insane. Have you documented everything? Dates, times, missed pickups? You might need to file for contempt if the court order isn't being honored. Could also trigger a custody modification. Honestly, a co-parenting app with timestamped communication might be your best defense.

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PPhilRegular2w ago

8 months of this is tough man. I'm in the co-parenting situation too and schedule flakiness drives me insane. Have you documented every missed switch? That's going to be important if you need to go back to court. Keep a log of what's happening.

PPhilRegular2w ago

Document everything and stay calm. I know it's hard but going into court heated never helps your case. Keep records of every instance and be specific about dates and times.