Ex won't stick to the custody schedule | DadHQ

Ex won't stick to the custody schedule

20h ago1 min read

So I have the kids every other weekend and one night a week, but my ex keeps texting me last minute asking to swap days. At first I was flexible because I want the kids to see her, but now it's happening every single week and I can't plan anything. I told her we need to stick to the schedule so I can actually have a life, and she said I'm being selfish. Am I wrong for wanting predictability? The kids are 6 and 8.

6 comments192 views

Comments(6)

SSteveRegularjust now

This is exactly why I keep a shared calendar app with my ex. Takes the texting back and forth out of the equation and everything is timestamped. Worth looking into if you haven't already.

JJoeRegularjust now

Last minute texts are the worst. I started asking my ex to give me 24 hour notice unless it's an emergency. Made a big difference. Might be worth a conversation when things are calm.

DDavid R.Regularjust now

Man, that's frustrating. I'm dealing with something similar and it's throwing off my whole week. Have you tried documenting these last minute changes? Might help if things ever go legal.

JJoeRegularjust now

The texting last minute thing is the worst part because you never know if you can make plans. I'd suggest documenting each time she does it and then having a conversation about how it's affecting you and the kids' routine. Consistency matters for them too.

JJake M.New Dad10h ago

Yeah custody schedules exist for a reason. They're not just for you, they're for the kids to know what to expect. If she keeps doing this, you might need to have that conversation documented or even back it up with a lawyer to enforce it.

JJake M.New Dad16h ago

This is so frustrating man. Last minute changes destroy your whole mental plan for the weekend. Have you tried writing down what's happening and bringing it up at a neutral time instead of responding in the moment? Helps keep emotions out of it.