My ex has been seeing someone for a couple months and the kids mentioned meeting him last week. I'm trying to be mature about it but it bothers me more than I expected. Not because I want her back or anything, just feels weird. How long should she wait before introducing someone to the kids? Is there an unwritten rule about this? Looking for some perspective from guys who've been through it.
This is tough. My sons mentioned meeting someone new with their mom and I'll be honest, my stomach dropped. But I had to remind myself that she's a person too and she's allowed to have a life. The kids seemed fine about it which helped. Does your ex seem like she's being thoughtful about how fast things are moving?
How did the kids bring it up? That's the tell right there. If they seemed casual about it, it's probably fine. If they seemed confused or upset, you might need to have a conversation with your ex about pacing. Either way this sucks to navigate but it's part of the deal with custody stuff.
Man that's rough. I haven't dealt with this yet but I know it's coming eventually. I think the key is keeping your reaction separate from what you let the kids see. They don't need to know if this bothers you, you know?
It's weird but it gets easier. First time I found out my ex was seeing someone I was not in a good place mentally. Now a couple years later I barely think about it. Your kids are going to be fine. The key is not badmouthing the guy to them no matter what.
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This is rough. The kids meeting him already happened so now it's about managing your feelings about it, which is different from controlling the situation. How are the kids reacting to him? That matters more than your comfort level honestly.
Did she talk to you first before letting them meet him or did they just mention it? That's the piece that would bother me more than the dating part.