Her new job has her working weekends now and she's asking if the kids can stay with me those weekends instead of following our court order. I want to be flexible but my lawyer said not to deviate from the order without modifying it legally. Has anyone dealt with this? I don't want to be a jerk about it but I also don't want to set a precedent that the custody schedule is just a suggestion.
My advice? Make sure the kids' routine stays as stable as possible through all this. Whatever you decide, keep things predictable for them. The court order exists for a reason, so don't let it get too loose just because things got inconvenient for her.
This is tricky because her job change isn't really your problem to solve, but I get wanting to be flexible for the kids. Maybe suggest she goes through the proper channels to modify the order so everyone's on the same page legally.
This is a good problem to have honestly. If you can take the weekend shifts and it makes things easier, it actually benefits the kids because she's not stressed about work. That said make sure the arrangement still works for YOUR life too. Don't just say yes because it seems like the right thing.
Depends on your situation but if the kids get to stay with you more I mean that's a win right? As long as you're not getting burnt out from it. How many weekends are we talking?
Document this conversation and if you agree to it, get it in writing or updated in your custody agreement. I'm not trying to be cynical but changes should go through the right channels so there's no confusion later.
Sign in to join the conversation.
I'd get that in writing before you agree to anything, even if it seems friendly. Had to learn that the hard way with my ex. Better to protect yourself and the kids with a clear amendment than deal with confusion later.