My ex is badmouthing me to our kids | DadHQ

My ex is badmouthing me to our kids

5d ago1 min read

Found out from my 12 year old that mom's been telling him I don't pay enough child support and that's why they can't get a new car. That money is literally being taken from my paycheck and she's getting it. I'm furious but I know if I rant to him about her it just makes things worse. How do you guys handle it when the other parent is poisoning the well? My lawyer says I need documentation but what do I do in the moment when my kid comes home thinking I'm the bad guy?

7 comments181 views

Comments(7)

JJordanNew Dad5d ago

Man that's tough because he's old enough to understand but still just a kid. Maybe have a calm talk with him about how child support works without getting into it with mom. He needs to know you care about him.

CChris N.Regular5d ago

This is exactly why I document everything with my ex. Every payment, every receipt. Sounds like you need to have a conversation with her about keeping money stuff off limits with the kids. They shouldn't be stressed about cars and bills.

JJoey M.Regular5d ago

That's rough man. Don't let her pull the kids into adult finances like that. You know what you're paying and that's between you two. Keep your head up with the kids.

MMarcusNew Dad4d ago

That's rough. A 12 year old doesn't need to know about child support or financial stuff. She's using him as a messenger and that's not fair to him. Have you been able to talk to your son about it without trash talking back?

RRyanRegular5d ago

Sorry you're dealing with this. Keep being the stable parent he needs and eventually he'll figure out the truth on his own.

RRyanRegular4d ago

Don't engage with it. Just reassure your 12 year old that you love him and handle the adult stuff with your ex directly, away from the kids. Kids shouldn't be put in the middle like that.

MMarcusNew Dad3d ago

This is a real problem and honestly it might be worth documenting and bringing up with your custody lawyer if you have one. Parental alienation is taken seriously by courts. Keep your communication about finances and custody between adults.