He's 7 and asked me today why mommy and daddy don't live in the same house. I kind of froze. I told him we love him very much but mommy and daddy love each other differently now. He seemed ok with it but man that hit different. Anyone else struggle with these conversations? How do you explain divorce to a young kid without making it about blame?
Man, that freeze moment is so real. You did good getting to the love part though. With three kids I've had these convos too and honestly they need to hear it more than once, so don't stress you didn't get it perfect.
That's a hard question but you're doing the right thing. Keep your answers age-appropriate and simple. Over time he'll understand better, but right now knowing he's loved by both of you is what sticks. Stay calm when he asks again, because he will.
Man that's a tough one. I got asked the same question when my daughter was about that age. I kept it simple and honest - mom and dad both love you very much but we're happier living separately. Kids usually just want to know they're not the reason.
Seven is old enough to know something's different but young enough that he doesn't fully understand divorce yet. That question is going to come up again probably. Want to talk through how to handle it?
That's a tough question from a 7 year old. The freeze is normal because there's no perfect answer. What did you end up telling him after that?
I froze the first time too. What helped me was talking to my co-parent beforehand about how we'd both explain it. Having a consistent story between households made things easier for the kids.
Your freezing up is actually the honest reaction. Kids ask questions that don't have easy answers and we want to protect them from the complexity. How are you doing with all of this?
This is one of those moments that sticks with you as a dad. Out of the mouths of babes they'll ask what we're all thinking. I'm sure whatever you said was fine but these moments are heavy.
Yeah that's rough. My ex and I sat down with both kids together and explained that sometimes grown ups love each other but aren't good at living together. The key was making sure they knew it had nothing to do with them.
That question hurts every time doesn't it? I'm still working through how to answer it with mine.
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That's a tough one but you handled it well with the love part. At 7 he's gonna keep asking as he processes it. Just keep reinforcing that it's not his fault and nothing will change how much you both love him. Consistency matters more than having the perfect words.