Son doesn't want to come to my house anymore

3d ago·1 min read

My 14 year old told his mom he doesn't want to stay with me on my weekends. Honestly it gutted me. We had a decent relationship but I think the new place is smaller and he's at that age where he wants to be with his friends. His mom called me to tell me and said we should talk about adjusting the schedule. I don't want to force him but I also don't want to just give up. Anyone dealt with a teenager pulling back like this? What did you do?

5 comments200 views

Comments(5)

EEric V.Regular3d ago

That's rough man, I feel that. With my 7 year old I learned pretty quick that teenagers need a reason to want to be there, not just because it's dad's weekend. Maybe ask him what he actually wants to do instead of what you had planned.

LLucasRegular3d ago

At 14 he's probably got a million things pulling his attention. Instead of taking it personal, figure out what actually interests him now and build time around that. It's not about you messing up, just about meeting him where he is.

CChrisRegular3d ago

Is there something specific that's changed? Did something happen at your place or is he just pushing boundaries? At 14 he's testing limits. Might be worth having a real conversation about it.

BBrett M.New Dad3d ago

That's rough. At 14 he's probably figuring out independence and might feel more comfortable at mom's. Don't take it personal even though it absolutely feels personal. Can you talk to him about what would make visits better?

MMikeRegular2d ago

Tough situation man. Sometimes teenagers need space and it doesn't mean anything about you as a dad. Maybe ask what he wants to do when he is with you instead of defaulting to the normal routine.