My kid asked me why I always make dad jokes
I told him it's because I'm a dad. He said that doesn't make it funny. I said well it doesn't have to be good to be a dad joke, that's the whole point! He rolled his eyes so hard I
EEric W.176 views
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Your best (worst) dad jokes, funny parenting moments, and things only dads understand.
955 threads
I told him it's because I'm a dad. He said that doesn't make it funny. I said well it doesn't have to be good to be a dad joke, that's the whole point! He rolled his eyes so hard I
Wife sent me to get milk and eggs. I come back with a rotisserie chicken too because it smelled amazing. She asked why I bought it when we didn't need it. I said well the chicken w
Stepping on a lego brick at 2am while getting water. No, actually worse: stepping on a lego brick at 2am while your kid is crying and you're walking around the dark house trying no
My 4 year old saw me making coffee this morning and asked why I was making 'dad juice.' Apparently that's what he thinks coffee is now because I'm always drinking it. So now whenev
Tired. My buddy just had quads and I told him this joke. His response was just a blank stare and then he asked me to leave so he could sit in silence for 15 minutes. I think I've n
So I set up the perfect scenario to tell my kid a knock knock joke and he completely derailed it by asking if knock knock was a bad guy from Batman. Spent the next 20 minutes expla
Got excited about a new tool at the hardware store and spent 45 minutes explaining to my kid why a cordless impact driver was 'really cool' and 'so powerful.' He just stared at me.
I said 'it's dinner time' and he goes 'no dad that's not a time' and I was like 'well it is in this house buddy.' My wife didn't laugh but I thought it was gold.
Because it felt crumbly. My kids absolutely hate this joke but I keep telling it anyway. That's the dad life right there.
Caught my 5 year old drawing on the bathroom mirror with a marker this morning. I'm standing there trying not to lose it and he looks up at me real serious and goes 'don't worry da
My 6 year old asked the cashier if the bananas were ripe. I said 'no they're just going through a phase.' My wife walked away from me. Worth it.
I told him it's a fatherly duty. He groaned so hard I think he pulled something. Mission accomplished.
Anything you want, he can't hear you. My kids have stopped asking why I tell these jokes and started just accepting them as part of their DNA now.
Caught him muting his phone when I walk in the room. Asked him if I was boring him. He said 'Dad, you're not boring, you're just... a lot.' I think that's code for 'your jokes are
My daughter asked me why I was reading the instructions for the coffee maker. I said 'Because I need to follow the brew-les.' Her eye roll was magnificent. She's 12 and already jud
I told him 'We're going to have to tighten our belts with the budget.' He looked at me confused and said 'Dad your belt already looks pretty tight.' Kid's got comedy gold on accide
We went yesterday and my son kept yelling 'THE BOOK IS CALLING ME' every time he found something he wanted. The librarian was not amused. He's 7 and I don't know where he gets this
Took both kids grocery shopping. My youngest pointed at Lucky Charms and said 'Dad can we get the magical ones?' I said 'Son that's just marketing lies like when your mom said you'
I was in the kitchen thinking about how I told my daughter that the garden was where we grow our vegetables and she asked if we also grow french fries. She's 4. Wife did not find i
An insta-dad. Get it? Because he's in the water. My kids groaned so hard this morning when I dropped this one. Mission accomplished.