Your best (worst) dad jokes, funny parenting moments, and things only dads understand.
80 threads
Looking to expand my arsenal here. Need fresh material that goes beyond the standard 'I'm on a seafood diet' stuff. Any books or websites you guys recommend? I'm willing to invest
I told my 5 year old that the sun is a big ball of gas and he goes 'Dad that explains why you keep leaving the room after dinner' I'm dying. When did they get so savage?
My kids tell me everything in the car but nothing at home. I learned more about my son's day on the 15 minute drive to soccer practice than I have in the last 3 months. Apparently
Tell my son bedtime is 8pm. At 8:15 he's SHOCKED we're actually going to bed. Like the time limit was just a suggestion. Then I remember I do the same thing when my wife says we ha
Think about it. A little extra cushion is perfect for kids to sit on when they get tired. Built in storage for snacks in the back pockets. And nobody expects a fit guy to be a dad
Because it felt crumbly! My 4yo laughed for like 10 minutes straight at this one. Sometimes they laugh at the dumbest stuff and honestly that's the best part of my day.
My kid actually came home today and told me a dad joke HE made up. It was terrible. I was so proud I actually teared up a little. 'Why did the math book look sad? Because it had to
I was trying to explain how the internet works and I said 'imagine the internet like a bunch of tubes' and he goes 'Dad you already look like a bunch of tubes so I think I understa
I yelled 'That's what I call a GOAL-den opportunity!' when she scored and the other parents just stared at me. My daughter scored twice more and refused to celebrate because she sa
He said it was still under development lol. I'm not even sorry. He groaned so hard I think he pulled something
Walked past the produce section and said 'lettuce have a moment of silence for these vegetables' to literally no one. A random lady gave me the look. My wife pretended she didn't k
Taking the family cross country next month and need some quality material to keep the kids entertained. They're 4 and 7 so nothing too complex. Already have the 'I'm not sleeping,
Looking to upgrade from my sad little Weber and want something decent but not breaking the bank. I've got about $600 to spend. Charcoal or gas? Let me know what you guys are using
So I took approximately 47 pictures and in exactly ZERO of them are all three of us looking at the camera and smiling at the same time. One has my son doing bunny ears. One I'm mid
So I told my son 'I'm reading a book about anti-gravity, it's impossible to put down' and he actually laughed. Then he goes 'Dad please never say that again.' Best and worst moment
Seriously this thing is amazing. I can cook dinner on the patio while the kids play and still keep an eye on them. Plus everything tastes better when a dad makes it outside. Don't
Do your kids actually groan at your jokes or do they just not laugh? Mine don't even acknowledge them anymore. Like I'll say something objectively hilarious and my 8 year old just
Caught myself saying 'back in my day' three times yesterday AND I got excited about a sale at Home Depot. Then I spent two hours organizing my garage by tool type. Send help or cof
A DOZZER! Got my whole family with that one at dinner tonight. My daughter said it was 'not even funny dad' but she was definitely trying not to smile. That's basically a win in my
My son has asked me 47 times today why the sky is blue. FORTY SEVEN. I gave him different answers each time because I'm losing it. One time I said it was because of sad clouds and