Things that only get funny when you're a dad
Found my 2 year old with his entire face covered in peanut butter looking absolutely terrified. Turns out the dog licked it off. He screamed and laughed at the same time. I'm sitti
LLuis M.177 views
13
Your best (worst) dad jokes, funny parenting moments, and things only dads understand.
681 threads
Found my 2 year old with his entire face covered in peanut butter looking absolutely terrified. Turns out the dog licked it off. He screamed and laughed at the same time. I'm sitti
He said 'Why did the cookie go to the doctor?' and I said 'I don't know why' and he goes 'Because it felt crumbly!' Then he absolutely lost it laughing at his own joke for like 5 m
Just realized I'm at the age where I genuinely find myself laughing at my own jokes before I even finish telling them. My kids groan every single time. This is my life now. I asked
Took my son to get milk and he asked why the eggs were in a carton. I said because they'd break if they were in a bag. He goes 'that's not very eggs-traordinary dad' and walked awa
Because he was outstanding in his field! My 6 year old groaned so hard when I told her this one at breakfast. Worth it.
I'll meet you at the corner! My kids have heard this one a hundred times and they still laugh. That's the ultimate dad joke victory.
My son knocked over a full glass of juice headed straight for the laptop. I caught it one handed without even thinking. My wife was like 'oh my god that was amazing' and I just loo
Because he heard the drinks were on the house.
I told her it's called 'in-her-itance' and she groaned so hard she nearly threw up. Mission accomplished.
I told him his room was so messy it looked like a tornado hit it. He goes, 'Dad, tornadoes don't leave toys everywhere, they clean everything up.' Like where is this confidence com
I said, 'You.' He said, 'That's so sweet, dad!' Then I said, 'Yeah, and your mom is my second favorite thing about being a dad.' He did not find that as funny as I did.
I'll meet you at the corner. My 5yo groaned so hard but then told it to his teacher the next day. Pretty sure I'm winning at this whole parenting thing.
Because it felt crumbly! My 4 year old laughed so hard at this one this morning. I think I'm losing it because I laughed harder than he did.
So I'm at Whole Foods with my son and he points at the organic section and goes 'Dad why is that food so expensive, did it graduate college?' I almost spit out my coffee. Where doe
Told my kids that the ice cream machine at McDonald's is broken because it's napping. They believed me for a solid three days. My wife is not amused but honestly I think this is pe
Took the kids to the grocery store and my 5 year old asked why there are so many choices of cereal. I said because life is about having options. He said that's dumb and just wants
I told him because they're too starchy. He groaned so hard he fell off the couch. Mission accomplished.
A dozer. My kids did not appreciate this one but I thought it was gold.
Threw my back out reaching for the remote yesterday. THE REMOTE. Now I'm one of those dads that groans when standing up. Pretty sure my kids think I'm dying every time I get off th
I said 8 because I'm not hungry enough to eat 12. My kids stared at me like I just invented stupidity. Apparently that's not how it works anymore.