Balancing work, family, and the mental load.
1020 threads
I'm a software engineer making solid money ($165k) but I travel constantly and my kids barely know me. I've been thinking about switching to like... sales engineering or something
Title change, $40k bump, corner office... everything I thought I wanted 3 years ago. But now my kids are 6 and 4 and I'd miss SO MUCH. My wife wants me to take it (the money would
Reading here how people struggle to be present after work and wanted to share what's been helping us. When I get home, I literally change clothes immediately - out of work pants, i
There's this weird cultural thing where dads are supposed to feel bad if they prioritize their job at all. Like I'm supposed to be thanking my lucky stars for every moment with my
Had to fly to Denver last week for 4 days and I couldn't stop thinking about my 5-year-old asking why I had to leave. He's in kindergarten and when I'm gone he has a hard time at p
Quick rant: we're paying $2,100/month for our 2yo at a decent (not even fancy) daycare in the SE Portland area. That's basically my car payment times two. I love our daycare but th
Genuine question. When I work past 6pm, which has been 2-3x a week lately, my wife handles bedtime solo and says the kids are bouncing off walls because they know dad might still s
My company's official policy says "flexible hours" but every time someone takes advantage of it, there's this weird resentment from management. Like, sure, you CAN leave at 3pm if
My wife is back at work 4 weeks postpartum (she wanted to, I didn't push it) and I stayed on for remote work since I had just started a new gig. Thought I'd be able to handle it. C
I've been in finance for 12 years. Good money, terrible hours. Two kids (6 and 3). Wife works part-time as a nurse. Been thinking about pivoting to something that lets me actually
Quick recommendation: if your workplace uses Slack, set up "Focus time" blocks where you're unavailable. I block 9-11am and 2-4pm so I can actually do deep work without 50 Slack me
Oof. That one stings. I was gone Wed-Fri, and when I got home my 7yo was like "oh hey dad" without looking up from his Switch. Wife said he asked about me once on day 2. Meanwhile
Got the paperwork for paternity leave (2 weeks) but my boss keeps hinting that "things are busy" and that maybe I could "ease back in" instead of fully disconnecting. I have the PT
We're paying $2,300/month for daycare for our 2yo. TWENTY-THREE HUNDRED DOLLARS. That's basically a house payment. With my wife's income and mine, after taxes and daycare we're bar
Wanted to share a win because I see a lot of posts here about feeling trapped in demanding jobs. I switched from an aggressive startup role to a B2B SaaS company that lets me do 7-
Not even the exhaustion or the money stuff, it's the guilt. I work in tech, decent job, decent pay, but I'm constantly feeling like I'm NOT ENOUGH. Not enough at work (leaving at 5
My company piloted a 4-day work week (Monday-Thursday) and I got approved for it. Yes, same pay. My Fridays with my 6yo are incredible - we go to the park, get ice cream, just chil
We're paying $2,400/month for one kid in the Seattle area. They just announced a 12% increase effective next month. That's basically another car payment. My wife makes less than wh
Been in sales for 12 years, making six figures, but I'm burnt out and hate the travel. Thinking about going back to school for something more stable with better work-life balance -
We just found out baby #3 is on the way and I'm... not confident about the finances honestly. We managed okay with two but three daycare spots at the same time? Three college funds