I asked my 8yo 'What do you call a fake noodle?' and he just looked at me and said 'Dad, please stop.' Before I could even deliver the punchline (an impasta, obviously). When did kids get so mean?
We put her down at 8pm and I woke up at 6:30am in a panic because it was so quiet. But no, she was just sleeping. My wife and I looked at each other like we won the lottery. Neither of us can remember the last time we got that much consecutive sleep. I'm a new man today.
We got discharged this morning and honestly I feel like they just handed us a fragile bomb and said good luck. Every time she breathes differently I check if shes still alive. My wife is sleeping but I cant shut my brain off. Is this normal? Do you guys just get used to the fear eventually?
My wife just rolled her eyes so hard when I told my 8yo that the grocery store doesn't sell eggs anymore because the chickens are on strike. Kid didn't get it at first but then cracked up when I explained. Wife just shook her head and left the room. Pretty sure that's when you know you've truly beco...
My 8 year old had his first real handshake with my business partner last week and I have to say I was proud. Before we went to the meeting I sat him down and showed him how to grip firm but not aggressive, look the man in the eye, and say his name clear and confident. My father taught me the same wa...
My company gives 4 weeks but I was worried about workload. Took 2 anyway because my wife really needed the help. Those two weeks were incredible man. Bottle feedings at 3am, changing diapers, getting to know my newborn. And honestly the work survived fine without me. I came back refreshed. If you're...
Used to be the guy who knew all the breweries and could crush a six pack on a Tuesday. Now I don't know what to do with my hands at barbecues. The dad identity got lost somewhere between the hangovers and the blackouts. Being present for my kids' games instead of trying to sneak out early to meet bu...
Been at my company for 8 years, came in early, stayed late, did honest work every single day. Found out they gave the job to a younger guy with half my experience because apparently he's more 'innovative' or some nonsense. My first instinct was to blow off steam but I took a breath instead. Told my ...
Got a 50/50 split but holidays are becoming a nightmare. We agreed to alternate years for Christmas but my son wants to be with both of us. His mom is willing to do a split day but then Im only seeing him 4 hours and it feels rushed. Anyone figure out a better way to handle this without upsetting th...
Took the family camping for the first time last weekend and forgot to pack half the stuff we needed, one kid got sick, and it rained the entire time. We came home a day early and honestly it was kind of a disaster but my wife and I couldn't stop laughing about how bad it was. Worth it for the memori...
My daughter talked back to her teacher and the school said I need to 'work with her on emotional expression.' I told my daughter she was disrespectful and she'll be apologizing to that teacher. When I was growing up, you didn't talk back to adults. Period. Now everyone acts like discipline is abuse....
Got 2 boys, 7 and 5. I'm trying to teach them to be respectful, to work with their hands, to say yes sir and no sir, and to handle their own problems without running to a teacher or principal. My wife is supportive but her sister keeps saying I'm raising them to be 'toxic' because we do yard work to...
Seriously need advice here. My son gets home from school and immediately asks for Roblox. I try to limit it to an hour but he throws an absolute tantrum when it's time to stop. We've tried taking the tablet away, setting parental controls, all of it. He just sits there saying he's bored when he can'...
So my 8 year old caught me losing my temper at a driver on the highway yesterday. I was yelling, honking, the whole thing. He asked me why I was being mean when we always talk about treating people with kindness and loving your neighbor. Hit me like a ton of bricks. How do you guys handle those mome...
Got my boat serviced, tackle box restocked, and alarm set for 5am. Been dreaming about hitting the lake all winter. Wife thinks I'm crazy for getting up that early but the bass don't wait for reasonable hours lol. Heading out with my buddy Rick who hasn't been out in years. Gonna be a good weekend.