How life changed since becoming a dad. Identity shifts, things you miss, things you gained, the transformation of fatherhood.
764 threads
Got my college sweetheart pregnant at 20. Had no plan, no money, parents flipped out. Worked two jobs, got my degree part-time, became a construction supervisor by 28. My kid is 9
Honestly the transition has been wild. I used to close bars at 3am, sleep til noon, spend my paychecks on concert tickets and random road trips. Now I'm up at 6am, I know all the w
Used to make 6 figures, had an office, business cards that meant something to someone. Worked 50-60 hours a week and barely knew my kids. One day my oldest asked me why I was alway
I was a pretty selfish guy after my first marriage ended. Lived alone, did whatever I wanted, thought that was freedom. Then I met Sarah and we had kids back to back. I'm not gonna
Three years ago I was sleeping til noon on weekends. Now I'm up at 6am making pancakes shaped like dinosaurs for a 4 year old who only eats the legs. I can't remember the last time
Used to stay at the office til 8 or 9pm working on projects. Loved that part of my job. Now I'm out the door at 5:30 like my life depends on it. Lost some of that identity as the h
Used to just get in the car and drive. Now everything needs to be planned three weeks in advance, scheduled around nap times and snack times and 'dad I have to pee' times. I miss t
Before kids I was about me. My schedule, my interests, my money, my time. It was amazing honestly. Now everything is about them and I love them so much it hurts. But sometimes at l
The day my son was born everything I thought mattered suddenly didn't. The promotion at work, the new car, the apartment in the cool neighborhood. All of it just faded like it was
Used to hit the gym five times a week, was in the best shape of my life. Now I'm lucky if I get 20 minutes on the treadmill twice a week when my wife can watch the kids. I'm heavie
Before kids I was 'the guy who had it together.' Had a sick apartment, went to concerts, dated around, had opinions about coffee beans. Now I'm the guy explaining to my 7 year old
When it was just me I'd spend two hundred bucks on a night out without thinking twice. Now I'm comparing prices on bulk diapers and calculating if we can afford the school field tr
Used to spend 2 hours at the gym 5 days a week. Had my whole identity wrapped up in being the fit guy. Now with two kids under 5 I'm lucky if I get 3 workouts in a month. My abs ar
My sister passed away 18 months ago and we took custody of her kids, ages 7 and 10. We were never planning on having kids. Our house was peaceful, our schedule was our own. Now it'
Spent 20 years as a confirmed bachelor. Had my routine, my hobbies, freedom. Met someone three years ago and suddenly I'm helping with homework, going to soccer games, dealing with
I was out 4-5 nights a week, sleeping till noon, no responsibilities. Fast forward to my daughter being born and I'm a completely different person. Can't party anymore, sleep is pr
I was that guy grinding 60+ hour weeks, always on email, missed so much. Got laid off 2 years ago and honestly it was a blessing. Now I freelance from home, make a bit less but I'm
Made the switch 8 months ago when our second was born and wife had the better job offer. I took some heat from family, especially my dad, but whatever. Miss: being able to grab lun
Just wanted to say this to someone who might get it. I was a mess in my twenties and early thirties. Couldn't keep a job, went through two failed relationships, drank every night t
I was immature, selfish, honestly kind of a jerk. Thought I had time to figure myself out. Then my ex got pregnant and I had to decide if I was going to be that guy or not. That wa