Dad reflexes saved the day at dinner
My son knocked over a full glass of juice headed straight for the laptop. I caught it one handed without even thinking. My wife was like 'oh my god that was amazing' and I just loo
CCarlos212 views
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Your best (worst) dad jokes, funny parenting moments, and things only dads understand.
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My son knocked over a full glass of juice headed straight for the laptop. I caught it one handed without even thinking. My wife was like 'oh my god that was amazing' and I just loo
Because he heard the drinks were on the house.
I told her it's called 'in-her-itance' and she groaned so hard she nearly threw up. Mission accomplished.
I told him his room was so messy it looked like a tornado hit it. He goes, 'Dad, tornadoes don't leave toys everywhere, they clean everything up.' Like where is this confidence com
I said, 'You.' He said, 'That's so sweet, dad!' Then I said, 'Yeah, and your mom is my second favorite thing about being a dad.' He did not find that as funny as I did.
I'll meet you at the corner. My 5yo groaned so hard but then told it to his teacher the next day. Pretty sure I'm winning at this whole parenting thing.
Because it felt crumbly! My 4 year old laughed so hard at this one this morning. I think I'm losing it because I laughed harder than he did.
So I'm at Whole Foods with my son and he points at the organic section and goes 'Dad why is that food so expensive, did it graduate college?' I almost spit out my coffee. Where doe
Told my kids that the ice cream machine at McDonald's is broken because it's napping. They believed me for a solid three days. My wife is not amused but honestly I think this is pe
Took the kids to the grocery store and my 5 year old asked why there are so many choices of cereal. I said because life is about having options. He said that's dumb and just wants
I told him because they're too starchy. He groaned so hard he fell off the couch. Mission accomplished.
A dozer. My kids did not appreciate this one but I thought it was gold.
Threw my back out reaching for the remote yesterday. THE REMOTE. Now I'm one of those dads that groans when standing up. Pretty sure my kids think I'm dying every time I get off th
I said 8 because I'm not hungry enough to eat 12. My kids stared at me like I just invented stupidity. Apparently that's not how it works anymore.
My 7 year old watched the whole thing and didn't say anything. When I finally found it in my back pocket he just shook his head and walked away. I think he's starting to understand
I told him I couldn't put it down. He didn't laugh. My wife laughed though which basically means I won.
My son asked me why I was putting ketchup on my pizza and I said I was just trying to be condiment-al. He groaned so hard he fell off his chair. I call that a win.
Well I laughed. That's at least one of us.
Went to the store with my 6 year old and she asked if we could get some juice. I said sure, we could really use something to get us through the day. She looked at me confused and I
The coach yelled "Come on girls, show some hustle out there!" and I immediately said to the dad next to me "Yeah they really need to kick it up a notch." He looked at me like I had