Balancing work, family, and the mental load.
722 threads
Just got back from a 3-day conference and I'm a wreck. Missed bedtime twice, my wife looked dead inside when I called to check in, and my 4yo asked why I don't love them as much as
Currently in software engineering (good money, flexible employer, burnout is real). Been thinking about transitioning to something lower-stress like teaching or government work. Wo
Just negotiated "flexible hours" with my new employer. Want to get a real sense of what that means in practice at other companies before I get surprised: Can I really start at 10a
Seriously looking at $2,100/month per kid for full-time. TWO kids. That's $4,200 a month. My entire second job would go to daycare. How is anyone doing this? Are we supposed to jus
Trying to figure out where my time is actually going. I feel like I work 8 hours, spend maybe 3-4 with the kids if they don't have activities, and then I'm too tired for anything e
I've been trying to make this work for 6 months and I'm losing it. My company let me go full remote after my second kid was born, which sounds amazing on paper. But my 3-year-old d
Got laid off from my finance job in January. Was a wake-up call honestly. Took some time to think about what I actually wanted instead of just climbing the ladder. Decided to take
Took 8 months of emails and conversations but they approved a Mon-Thu schedule starting next month. Tips if you're thinking about pitching this: Show the math: my productivity act
I keep seeing posts about yoga and morning runs. I hate both those things. What I actually do that works: 20 min of woodworking in the garage after kids sleep (feels productive AN
Had a wake-up call recently. My buddy mentioned planning a week away with his family in August and I realized I literally can't remember the last time we took more than a long week
Currently working 8:30-5:30, want to propose 7am-4pm so I can pick up my kindergartner at 4:15. Earlier start sucks but the pickup would change everything for my family. My manager
This is gonna sound dumb but I genuinely struggle with this. I finish work at 5pm, sometimes earlier on flex days. But my brain is still AT work, running through problems or stress
Got a call from daycare at 3pm that my 3yo fell and bumped his head. He was fine, no concussion risk, but I didn't even get to see him till 5 hours later when pickup. Wife was in b
For anyone doing the commute-to-daycare-to-office thing with two young kids: the Graco DuoGlider is legitimately game-changing. Can fit in most car trunks, handles both my 2yo and
4 days in Phoenix and I FaceTimed with the kids every night. My 4yo kept asking when I was coming home and it was... a lot. Got back last night and she wouldn't even talk to me for
My 3yo has been at Bright Horizons for 2 months and they say he barely touches lunch. Then I pick him up and he's asking for snacks within 5 minutes. I'm paying $2100/month for thi
In a meeting, my manager asked why I "couldn't stick around" more like the rest of the team. For context, my contract is 9-5. I leave at 5. Everyone else apparently stays until 6 o
Small win but I'm celebrating it anyway. Spent the day on actual focused work, completed a deliverable, sent it to the client before 5pm, and picked up my kid on time without that
Switched roles internally to a job with predictable hours 5 months ago. Started keeping a little tally to see if I could make it through the holiday quarter without bailing on pick
Took 8 weeks when our second was born. First week back at work and it felt like I'd been gone 8 months—projects shifted, org chart changed, my team had resolved problems without me