Balancing work, family, and the mental load.
725 threads
There was a conference in Vegas that I was "supposed" to attend. My daughter's school recital was the same weekend. I told my boss I couldn't go. Waited for the world to collapse.
I've been using this app to actually SEE where my time goes when I'm trying to work and parent simultaneously. It's kind of eye-opening seeing that I spent 1.5 hours yesterday on a
Posted this in another thread but wanted to share here. Got offered a senior director role at my company - 25% raise, bigger team, etc. The catch? It would require 2-3 nights/week
Taking 6 weeks in the fall and my boss keeps "joking" about me bringing my laptop to the hospital. I'm not joking when I say I won't be answering emails. But somehow I feel like I
I've been in finance for 12 years. Good salary, benefits, but I hate it and I'm never home. Twin boys are 5 now and I want to actually know them. I'm thinking about going back for
I'm a software engineer making solid money ($165k) but I travel constantly and my kids barely know me. I've been thinking about switching to like... sales engineering or something
Title change, $40k bump, corner office... everything I thought I wanted 3 years ago. But now my kids are 6 and 4 and I'd miss SO MUCH. My wife wants me to take it (the money would
Reading here how people struggle to be present after work and wanted to share what's been helping us. When I get home, I literally change clothes immediately - out of work pants, i
There's this weird cultural thing where dads are supposed to feel bad if they prioritize their job at all. Like I'm supposed to be thanking my lucky stars for every moment with my
Had to fly to Denver last week for 4 days and I couldn't stop thinking about my 5-year-old asking why I had to leave. He's in kindergarten and when I'm gone he has a hard time at p
Quick rant: we're paying $2,100/month for our 2yo at a decent (not even fancy) daycare in the SE Portland area. That's basically my car payment times two. I love our daycare but th
Genuine question. When I work past 6pm, which has been 2-3x a week lately, my wife handles bedtime solo and says the kids are bouncing off walls because they know dad might still s
My company's official policy says "flexible hours" but every time someone takes advantage of it, there's this weird resentment from management. Like, sure, you CAN leave at 3pm if
My wife is back at work 4 weeks postpartum (she wanted to, I didn't push it) and I stayed on for remote work since I had just started a new gig. Thought I'd be able to handle it. C
I've been in finance for 12 years. Good money, terrible hours. Two kids (6 and 3). Wife works part-time as a nurse. Been thinking about pivoting to something that lets me actually
Quick recommendation: if your workplace uses Slack, set up "Focus time" blocks where you're unavailable. I block 9-11am and 2-4pm so I can actually do deep work without 50 Slack me
Oof. That one stings. I was gone Wed-Fri, and when I got home my 7yo was like "oh hey dad" without looking up from his Switch. Wife said he asked about me once on day 2. Meanwhile
Got the paperwork for paternity leave (2 weeks) but my boss keeps hinting that "things are busy" and that maybe I could "ease back in" instead of fully disconnecting. I have the PT
We're paying $2,300/month for daycare for our 2yo. TWENTY-THREE HUNDRED DOLLARS. That's basically a house payment. With my wife's income and mine, after taxes and daycare we're bar
Wanted to share a win because I see a lot of posts here about feeling trapped in demanding jobs. I switched from an aggressive startup role to a B2B SaaS company that lets me do 7-